Tuesday, March 4, 2014

...To Love Their Children

Who doesn't love their children? I personally don't know any mother who does not love their children. However, I do know, we as mothers have different ways of showing our children that we love them.

"That they admonish the young women to love their husbands, 
to love their children." ~Titus 2:4

I sat there pondering why would a verse such as this would even appear in the pages of Scriptures. So, of course, I had to search within my own heart to see if there were any areas I needed to work on as a mother. God knows how much I love my children. I really like them as people. They are fun to be around. My days are often willed with laughter when they send me funny text messages. They are not perfect, but as their mother, neither am I. Perhaps that's the problem? I don't know...

I've met mothers who just can not forgive themselves for mistakes they have made training children during their younger years. Most of my children are adults now with the exception of one. I have mom friends who have children around the same age as mine. As mothers we talk about things that are happening with our children. Here's where I think the problem(s) occur when talking about our children. Especially our adult children.

We have the tendency to share too much of our children's personal business.

Hold up! Before you say, "I'm just sharing with my friends." 

Ask yourself this question, "Would my child(ren) want Jane Doe to know that this is going on in their lives?"

I'm not saying we can't share with our friends. I have a few friends that I have heart to heart talks with about some deep personal things that I would not want the world to know. Most of those things are about me. I also share things about my husband and my children. Those things are shared when I'm asking for help while exposing my own flaws as a wife and a mother. Those things are also shared privately.

When we as mothers share things publicly and in a large group settings about our children, is that loving them the way that they would interpret love? We all interpret love differently. To our children, especially our adult children, telling others about their privately struggles and weaknesses could result in hurt feelings and a sense of betrayal. Our intentions are to never hurt our children. That's why we need to take an honest look inward and ask ourselves why are we sharing this or that.

Moms give yourself a break. Don't be too hard on yourself. Don't be too hard on your children either. No I'm not saying to look the other way and nod "yes" to sin. What I am saying, be careful how much we share about our children with others. If you need help processing something that your children are going through, get with one, maybe two people and ask them to pray for you. After they are done praying for you, then ask them to pray with you as you pray for your children. Those are your children. You should be the one bombarding heaven on behalf of your children.

I want to encourage you to love your children like never before. With loving kindness, God drew us to Himself. Let's show our children that kind of love.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

One thing that I have been guilty of is sharing positive things about my kids only to skip over the negative. Negative things can be viewed as "telling their business". For a LONG time I just thought by being open, people would somehow feel connected to my struggles. Thank you for this insightful post.