"My Boaz" ~ By: Ruth

The excerpt below was written by my daughter Ruthie on Tuesday, May 12, 2009 at 5:41pm. I was looking through her notes on Facebook and can across this note she wrote. She titled it "My Boaz" I've been actively involved with a group on Facebook called "Daughter's of the King" and we're doing a study on the Book of Ruth . When I came across this, I found some similarities in my writings on the Book of Ruth and that of my daughters. It was so encouraging to read what Ruthie had written. Now that she's in a courtship, I'm glad I took the time to invest in her and train her to be a godly woman. I joked around a few months ago about waiting for my Boaz to come on the scene. And even in the midst of the joking, something started to really stir in my heart.

In Bible times, when parents named their children, those names had very prophetic meaning. They'd be named, and somewhere in the span of their lifetime, a situation (or string of situations) would occur that fell in line with that name. I have always found that completely amazing! How did the parents know? Did the person give meaning to the name or did the name give meaning to the person or is it both? (Things that make you go hmmmmm =) )

But looking over the book of Ruth, I see alot of connections between this Biblical character and myself. In the Hebrew, Ruth means "Beautiful friend" or "Friend of Beauty". I like the explanation given to the name Ruth here:
"She is strong, dedicated, well respected, and hard working; she will fight for those she loves; a born leader"

What a great name I have! I love it! (Thank you Mom!)

I share basically all of these characteristics with Ruth. Not only that, but Ruth also had her share of hardships. She ended up a widow after her husband, brother-in-law, and father-in-law all died. She had left the land which she came from in order to stick by her mother-in-law who was really going through it. She was a stranger in a foreign land. She was just doing the best she could to honor Naomi and God.

And man, in so many ways, that has been my story. Things in my life have died in the past. There have been moments of feeling like I don't belong. Moments when all I had to hold onto were the promises God had made me.

But none-the-less, Ruth positioned herself in the best place to find the awesome man of God she deserved more than anyone else--Boaz. Boaz was wealthy and prosperous, but caring and compassionate to those under him. He was just minding his own business when he saw Ruth for the first time. He inquired of her. And all Ruth was doing was being faithful to what Naomi had said. She was just going about her business, not trying to seek the attention of anyone, not wanting to be put first, but rather, humbly stepped back and was last. And THAT is what drew Boaz to her.

How many times do we young women feel like we need to strive in order to have the man God created for us to be with to see us? We've got it wrong, girls. You need to do only one thing: just be you. Don't work to get attention. If you have to work to get it, then maybe he's just not Boaz. Don't try to get the spotlight. Ruth placed herself last, and as a reward, she became the great grandmother of King David, and she is found in the blood line of Jesus! And just be patient. Go about your business. Serve the Lord. Serve the Church. Keep your eyes focused on harvesting for the Kingdom as Ruth was harvesting for Naomi, and one day when you aren't expecting it, you'll look up and see your Boaz =)

That's really all I wanted to say. That's something I've been letting marinate in my heart for months now, but couldn't quite find the words to explain it all. But I have now =)

True Love Really Does Wait

February is the month when we will hear and see the words, "I Love You" everywhere we go. During this time there will be young men and especially young women waiting for Cupid's arrow to pierce them. I've seen many young women that will put themselves in Cupid's path on purpose to make sure they're hit. They can be standing from afar watching Cupid do his thing. They've seen him lodge the arrow so deep into another woman's heart, only to yank it out and take a piece of it with him. Willing to look past the fact that he's planted a seed that that he will not water nor provide nourishing food.

We tell ourselves that it's different this time. It's different because I'm different. I'm not like all the other silly girls. He loves me.....

Young women believe a lie straight from the pit itself. It's easy to believe because we all want to be loved. What woman wouldn't want to be held by a man and have him whisper words to us that sends our imagination seeing him running across the field towards us with a bouquet of flowers hand picked by him.

Then next thing you know you've given something precious to him that God intended for your husband. You did it because you really love him and he loves you. News flash, "True Love Waits!"

Love is not suppose to hurt the core of who you are. Love is not suppose to leave you with a heart so broken that the only way you feel you can mend it it by giving it to someone new. Only to say the same line over again to ourselves, "It's different because I'm different. I'm not like all the other silly girls. He loves me....." Last I knew a gerbil is something that's suppose to jump on a wheel and go round and round. Not you!

"True Love Waits!" and it will wait as long as you need it to. I Corinthians 13 tells us that love is patient and it's kind. If your beau does not display either of these characteristics, it's not love and he is not the one for you!

It's not to late for you to get a fresh start. When we repent and come to Christ, we become new creature. That old nature is gone. You can start today, February 1st, and make a commitment that you will wait.

If you're a mother and you think that there's no way of your child changing and making a commitment to wait, think again. Your daughter is crying out for boundaries to be made in her life. Offering to give her birth control pills is not creating a boundary for her. Giving you son a condom "just in case" he needs it is not creating a boundary. Teach them the importance of waiting. Waiting for that true love, even if they've made a mistake. God doesn't throw us away when we make a mistake.

If you're a young woman who wants to make a commitment and need someone to be a mediator between you and your beau, yes I said a mediator and not an accountability partner. The reason why I say this is because you can tell your accountability partner what you want them to knew. A mediator will be in the midst of the relationship offering guidance and pointing you in the right direction. Find a couple in your church to help you in your relationship process.

Psalm 25:21 ~ "Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, For I wait for you."

*The young lady in the picture above is my daughter Ruthie. She took this picture and I titled it, "Waiting For Boaz" Ruthie is in a "Father Led, God Inspired" courtship right now. I will talk more about that in a later post. Her and Ryan have made a choice to demonstrate God's love and be an example to other youth by making a commitment to wait. They both say, that not only do they want to please God, but they want to make their parents proud as well.

I've Tapped Into Something and It Works!

I really can't tell how it happened or when it started to happen because it's been going on for years. I don't even know what I did to make it happen in the first place. All I know is that it happens and I love it! There are these random words of expression that comes from the mouth of my dear husband. These words cause me to melt like a popsicle on the sidewalk in the middle of January.

He tells me all the time that he reads about me in the Bible. Then he'll proceed to read the Scripture to me and explain why it's talking about me. As I sit there like a school girl blushing gazing into his eyes, I can't help but to wonder what did I do to deserve this.....

Society tells me that I'm not what a man wants in a woman because I'm overweight. That theory was blown out of the water when my husband said the reason why he loves my stomach and can't stop touching it is because I carried his children in it.

Even today the children are still amused when their dad comes into the kitchen and loves on me. They may say things like, "Ewww get a room." Or, "That's gross. Don't be kissing mom while she's cooking." All the while they are beaming at the sight of their dad loving their mom.

Did I tap into something that caused him to openly express his love and affection for me that so many women desire? I'm not sure. I've tried answering this question so many times. I'm a simple girl living a life of simplicity. I dress simple. There's nothing extravagant about my hair. My makeup is little to none. My nails are.....well, let's not go there.

What could I have done to cause him to follow me around the house just because he "wants to" be in my presence? What caused him to put me so high on the pedestal? I often tell him that I'm not perfect and I'll fall off. His response is that he'll catch me and put me back up there.

Could it be that just maybe following Scripture and totally abandoning myself to God's will and not my own cause such a reaction? Have I tapped into something in the Word of God and embraced it with every fiber of my being? I don't know, but whatever I've tapped into works so I'll keep doing it.

Ephesians 5:22 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

My Invisible Brake

After over a year of being chauffeured around by my 18 year old son I should be used to it, right?! Wrong! Last night while riding home from church I realized why I'm so tensed whenever I came home. I can feel it all over my body. My neck is so stiff. I move as if I'm wearing a neck brace. I don't think the best masseuse can loosen the knot that's growing in my shoulders. Just thinking about my legs and how they're so sore upon the exit of his vehicle makes them hurt as I'm writing this. Why so much drama?! Not with my son, but his with momma. I figured it out last night. It's the brake pedal that's on the passenger's side. My side!

This brake pedal wasn't put in the car by the manufacture. Neither my son nor my husband install it. Who installed the brake pedal that I've used for over a year now and has cause such harm to my body? Some may say it's a figment of my imagination. But how can something that's so real or at least seems so real be my imagination. Could my imagination be running away with me? Of course not. It's real. I use it. Maybe my husband uses it too, but just don't want to admit it.

Admission.....hmmm.....

Maybe I just don't want to admit that my son is a young adult now and he knows how to drive. Maybe I won't admit that it's hard for me, a mom, too see him as a man developing into his own identity. After all, he did tell me when I address him and his brothers by trying to get there attention not to used the word "boys" But they are my boys. Ooops! There I go again not admitting that my son is a young man. Since I am admitting some things, maybe it's time I admit that I installed the invisible brake pedal.

"I installed my invisible brake pedal."

Commitment

New Year's Day has come and gone. People are talking about their resolutions: go on a diet, walk two miles a day, get organized, clean out the hall closet, spend more time with the family, give more attention to devotions and prayer.

Promises, promises.

Talk, as the old adage says, is cheap. It's now two weeks into the new year, and most of those resolutions have already gone into the recycling bin. The spirit may be willing, but the flesh just can't seem to keep up. We mean well, we really do. We fully intend to keep those promises, this time. But before long "this time" becomes like all the other times. We slip back into our old comfortable patterns.

Why is it so difficult for us to keep the commitments we make? Perhaps because the changes we seek are external rather than internal. We can make vows to God and to others until Jesus comes, but unless true commitment is rooted deep in our hearts, we are bound to fail, to disappoint our loved ones and ourselves.

We live in a society where lack of commitment is the norm. If the road to marital bliss gets a little rocky, bail out and start over with someone new. If a job's tougher than you planned, turn it over to someone else-or just abdicate it altogether. If you're always late for appointments-hey, no big deal. They'll wait.

No wonder we have trouble keeping our word. No wonder our zeal flags and our determination fades. Commitment, in the modern world, simply isn't a very high priority.

To God, however, commitment is the very bedrock of faith. And it begins, not with our external efforts to change our outward patterns, but with a profound inward conviction that draws us into a commitment to Someone greater than ourselves.

"How can I repay the Lord for all His goodness to me?" the Psalmist ask. "I will lift up the cup of salvation and call upon the name of the Lord. I will fulfill my vows to the Lord in the presence of all His people." (Ps. 116:12-14)

When we commit our lives to God, something happens deep within us. Our priorities begin to changes. We begin to see the spiritual truth keeping our word is not just a matter of making a good impression, but a matter of being true to the One who created us and redeemed us, the One in whose image we have been reborn.

Commitment is not an outward effect, but an inner transformation.

It's not a New Year's resolution; it's the gift of grace.

*Taken from the book "Simple Words of Wisdom 52 Virtues For Every Woman" by: Penelope J. Stokes

Dare To Dream

There are times when I'm asked if I'm related to Martin Luther King Jr. Hmmm.....what would give someone that idea? With a smile on my face, I politely say, "No, but my husband is Don King." For those of you who have meet my husband and know the boxing promoter Don King, you should be chuckling by now.

I started thinking about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Then it clicked. Him and I do have something in common. We may not be blood related, but we share something and it's not just our last names. He was a dreamer and so am I.

Often times dreamers are told that they are living in a fairy tale and their imagination is to far fetched to ever come true. A dreamer has the tendency to look beyond the here and now, but see what's ahead. There are times when a dreamer can ask, "Did you see that?" Only to be told no. To top it off, no one around you saw it but you.

We walk away scratching our heads.

Next thing you know the dreamer is at it again. We just can't shake off the feeling we felt while dreaming. Dreaming about watching our children minister to the multitude of people. Leading them into the presence of God as the angelic voice comes from the mouth of your offspring. Standing at the altar as your lad gives an invitation to invite others to give their hearts to Jesus. In awe as you see your younger ones hunger for the Word of God. You get up in the middle of the night because you're awaken by a light. Only to find that they have their Bibles cracked open. Then you hear, "Just one more chapter Mom and then I'll go to bed." Watching the rosebud develop into a beautiful rose right before your eyes. Standing outside on the gravel waving down the street as you see your prodigal coming home. Working side by side as husband and wife in the ministry. Becoming pillars in the local church to carry out the vision God gave your leader.

Yes, I was at it again, dreaming. With one exception, my dreams are reality because I dared to dream!

As we approach the close of an old year and began a new one, I want to challenge you to dream. Some dreams you may not be able to share with others, that's fine. For 2010, I dare you to dream.....

He Took A Second Look

Lately I've been talking to one of my son about what to look for in a wife. Yes, I know he's only 18, but that day will come when he comes to me and say, "Mom, I met a girl and I'm really interested in her."

I have yet to hear those words come from his mouth. He has many female friends. I for one consider him to be one of my best friends. We can talk about anything. Sometimes we can have deep conversations. Sometimes it's about politics, ministry, marriage, having solutions to the world's problems, things we're passionate about, ect.

Over the years we've talked to our children openly about relationships and why we don't like dating. Our son has never been on an official date. You know the kind where he goes and picks her up. Takes her to dinner and a movie, alone. Would he like to go to dinner and a movie with a young lady? Perhaps, maybe, but with whom?

Sometimes I scratch my head because I really don't know what he's looking for in a young lady. I have an idea, but when I ask him, he says stuff like, "She's got to have a nice personality." Me being the mom, I'm like "What else?" Then there's this awkward silence....

A few weeks ago he mentioned to me that he saw a young lady wearing a skirt. I was kind of puzzled because he sees young ladies in skirts all the time, but something was different about this skirt. The next words to proceed out of his mouth was, "She had on a modest skirt and she looked like a lady."

Then it dawned on me that it's not very often that he sees a young lady dressed modest. He told me he had to take a second look. Wow!..... Imagine that, a young man taking a second look at a young lady dressed in modest attire.